Reaching Hearts: Flex Your Kindness Muscle

Photo by Jelleke Vanooteghem on Unsplash

This week, we’re working out one of the most underestimated Love Muscles: Kindness.

Not just random acts of kindness (though those are great too) — but intentional, relational kindness. The kind that says, “I see you. I care. You matter.” Even when you’re tired. Even when it’s hard. Especially then.

Kindness isn’t just “being nice.” It’s how we build emotional safety, soften tension, and grow deeper love — one thoughtful choice at a time.

This Week’s Focus:

Just like physical muscles, kindness needs regular movement to stay strong. In relationships, that looks like:

• Choosing patience instead of irritation

• Speaking gently, even when frustrated

• Doing something thoughtful without being asked

• Letting someone else go first (in traffic, or in healing)

• Being as kind to yourself as you are to others

These small, steady choices add up to a powerful emotional tone that can make or break the relationship environment.

Kind People Are Heroes:

In discussing the topic of kindness with a dear friend, she pointed out, most astutely, that unkindness has kindness within it. We discussed, and as often is the case, she shared much wisdom with me.

“Scared and sacred are spelled with the same letters. Awful proceeds from the same root word as awesome. Terrify and terrific. Every negative experience holds the seed of transformation.” ― Alan Cohen

Put on a posture of kindness. Is this like a jacket or slacks? Clothe ourselves with kindness? Look for and find ordinary ways to make an extraordinary difference in someone’s day. Multiple someone’s even.

Notice others.

Encourage generously.

Serve joyfully.

“Kindness is evidence of impenetrable strength. It is the willingness to stay soft in a world that tries to harden you at every corner.” — Brianna Wiest

I believe kindness is part of our nature. We are born into this world knowing kindness. As little children, we want to help. Always.

Somewhere along the line, unkindnesses interrupt our innocence. May our parents tell us to “Stop That!” or siblings make fun of us. We grow hesitant. Others might do things or say things. We start to recognize there is unkindness in the world.

Yet, if we go back up to our original quote here, we read, “… Every negative experience holds the seed of transformation.” If this is true, don’t experiences of unkindness also have within them the seed of kindness? Whether as we witness them or they are done to us.

The light shines over the dark to create a shadow. So, will kindness outshine unkindness? It’s not a versus or opponency, though I think that’s what unkindness hopes.

Kindness needs not to defeat unkindness. They are not even in the same league.

Kindness brings victory.

“Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about.”
 — Ian Maclaren

Mini Kindness Challenge:

Do one of the following each day this week (all with one person - and with a different person each week):

• Write a thank-you text or note

• Give a genuine compliment (bonus: make it specific!)

• Do one invisible act of kindness with no need for recognition

• Show kindness in a moment of conflict (yes, that one!)

• Practice kindness toward yourself — rest, breathe, affirm

You’ll be surprised how good this feels. And how contagious it is.

This Week’s Worksheet & Reflection Plan:

7-Day Kindness Practice Worksheet (your free copy)

Let’s flex that kindness muscle, together.